What choice do we have when we think we are ready to explode over some relative or friend who has slighted us in a seemingly unforgivable way?

We can choose to grab hold of a Gemara Rosh Hashana 17a, six lines up from the bottom. This is one of the most incredible statements in all of Shas which teaches a most significant, once-in-a-lifetime opportunity:

“One who forgives others will be forgiven for all of his sins.”!!!

What a unique opportunity!

Of course it is difficult to be tolerant, not to measure the exact pain and agony and desire to teach that person a lesson once and for all. How can we pass over the hurt and the pain? How can we erase our suffering and embarrassment?

We can focus on the joys of becoming sin-free, the satisfaction, excitement, peace and ecstasy.  We can change our lives in one swooping mitzvah.


But wait a minute… this person just punched me in the face, so to speak, and now you’re suggesting that I should think about forgiving him?? The Sefer Hachinuch explains we have a mitzvah (Vayikra 19:18) “to love others as oneself.” This is the reason why we should not bear a grudge against others. Rather, realize that it was a message from Hashem Who runs the world!

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