Shavuos – The Culmination of a Special Bond

There were two friends who lived near each other. They developed a very close relationship, until one day one of them was forced to move away. As the moving day drew closer and the reality of departure seeped in, the deep feelings of their bond grew only stronger. On the night before the big move the two sat down for a final meal together. They reminisced the years that passed, and they promised each other to use every which way to preserve their friendship forever.

The Kedushas Levi tells us that this story is a description of the Yom Tov of Shavuos. On the second night of Pesach we begin a relationship. Not a relationship with another human being, but one with a mitzvah. The great mitzvah of Sefiras HaOmer. For forty nine days each evening when we count, we draw closer and closer to our special mitzvah. And then on night 49 we are faced with the reality of closure to this unique relationship. Shavuos is our closing banquet with our mitzvah. We celebrate together on Shavuos and we commit to hold on to this bond forever.

The Expression of a True Relationship

It’s remarkable. A mitzvah is meant to be so real and so alive to us, that we are expected to create a real relationship with it. The truth is that our great leaders lived this way. When Rav Moshe Feinstein zt”l told his driver that he can’t pass in front of someone davening because there was a wall in front of him, he was expressing how real and alive his seif in Shulchan Aruch was to him. When Rav Aharon  Kotler zt”l told a great machzik Torah that though they might have an equal share in Olam Habah but he has so much more pleasure in Olam Hazeh, he was telling of his real relationship he had with the Torah. The deep feelings of pleasure were just a natural product of this bond. And when the Aderes zt”l kissed his lulav at the close of Sukkos with tears streaming down his eyes, he was saying goodbye to a dear friend.

A Miracle of Truth

In truth, at one point in history every one of us had this real connection towards Torah and mitzvos. This was at Matan Torah, and the seforim tell us that every year on the Yom Tov of Shavuos it all replays again. Let’s explain.

The Torah tells us [Shemos 20:15], “V’chol ha’Am royim es hakolos…” Chazal explain that even though sound is something that can only be heard and not seen, but at Matan Torah Klal Yisroel had vision of all the sounds. Chazal add that in addition to this nes there was “Shomin es hanireh” which means the sights of Matan Torah which were normally seen were actually heard at Matan Torah.

Rav Chaim Volozhiner explains that at the time of Matan Torah, Hashem gave Klal Yisroel a tremendous experience. All the feelings that a person has naturally towards gashmiyus and ruchniyus were totally interchanged. Every ruchniyus belief wasn’t only understood, it was felt. Kedushah and Taharah became feelings that were tangible. The taste of Torah became as real as the taste of a delicious dish. Gashmiyus on the other hand became abstract. The natural enjoyment and excitement of worldly pleasures were lost. A person needed to believe and imagine that the essence of these pleasures exist. This is what Chazal are telling us when they say “Royim es hanishma v’shomim es hanireh”. The “nishma” is a reference to all ruchniyus which became so real to us that we actually saw it. “Nirah” is a reference to gashmiyus which became so abstract that we had to hear about and believe.

This amazing miracle that we experienced wasn’t just meant for that time. The Torah warns, “Hishomer l’cha pen tishkach es hadvorim asher ra’uh einecha.” Be very careful that you never forget this very special miracle. The Torah then says, “Vihodatim livanecha v’livnai vanecha.” This is a command for every father to tell over this miracle and paint for his child this moment of truth. By telling over the experience at Sinai where all the pleasure was reserved for the real things in this world, he is painting for his child a moment of truth. The father is instructing his child to work to create for himself these true feelings forever.    

The Guide to Connection

Every Yid yearns to feel a deep connection with Hashem and His Torah. We would be drawn so much more towards a life of kedushah if we would only feel all our beliefs. No Yid that would sell one mitzvah of hanachos tefillin for a million dollars. Each of us really believes that the value of our mitzvos tefillin can’t be matched by all the money in the world. But at the same time we can’t seem to find the exciting feelings of our million dollar acquisition when we put on our tefillin every morning. What is the path to a life of connection? How can we relive the feeling that we ourselves felt at Har Sinai?

The Ramchal in Mesillas Yesharim reveals to us one of the secrets to acquiring the feelings of connection we so badly crave. When one outwardly displays actions that represent a certain feeling, automatically that feeling will be born within him. If one wishes to feel love and excitement towards Avodas Hashem, he must first act out those very actions that one would do after he actually has the feelings of love and excitement.

We might not realize that there are many examples in our own lives where were actively play out this concept. Take an example, fire. Every parent teaches their child about the dangers of fire. But a parent wants a child to actually fear playing with fire. Parents are quite successful in creating this fear. The average five your old is pretty scared of fire, and this is without ever touching it and feeling its harm. What’s the secret?

It’s simple. The parent had the child play out the actions of one who fears fire, and the fear then develops naturally in his heart. When a fire is lit, the mother places the child at a distance and she holds him back from approaching while explaining that she is doing so because of the harm the fire can cause. The child at first doesn’t have any inner fear, but every time he stands far from the flame with the intention of saving himself from harm he is automatically developing within himself a feeling of fear. The Mesillas Yesharim is telling us that a person can create all the feelings of love, excitement and fear in the world of ruchniyus by just using this formula. The simple act of running to perform a mitzvah will create appreciation and love towards the mitzvah because we believe in its value.

It’s amazing. We often see a person davening: swaying slowly, his eyes tightly shut, and the most serious expression on his face, and we understand that this man reached a special point where his davening is so real and so alive to him. What we don’t realize is that the eyes shut and the seriousness on his face is actually what created and is presently creating the connection that he has towards his davening. We often see a person focused so intensely on the sefer that lies in front of him as he sings the sweetest of tunes while learning the words of Torah.  We understand that this man has luckily reached the point where he actually experiences the delightful taste that we all believe the Torah contains. What we don’t understand is that his deep focus and his sweet singing of the words is what created and is presently creating the special flavor that his neshama feels.

Our Preparation

Shavuos morning as we hear the Torah laining we relive Matan Torah. But take a look at how we prepare ourselves. The night of Shavuos we act as if there is nothing in the world that can separate us from our deepest attachment to the Torah. We spend the entire night ignoring any feelings of fatigue and toil in the words of Torah. It’s quite possible that our learning on this night may not be a direct result of our present Ahavas HaTorah, but a night like this certainly creates the deepest Ahavas HaTorah and Ahavas Hashem within us.

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Rabbi Akiva Klein is a rebbe in Mesivta Bais Aron Tzvi Veretzky in Brooklyn, NY. Please send questions or comments to akivaklein1@gmail.com

  

 

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